Wednesday, December 1, 2010

Walker stopping holiday tree lighting?

Dear Exiting Gov. Jim Doyle,


I am writing to respectfully ask you to delay the Capitol holiday tree lighting scheduled for this Friday. In light State of Wisconsin’s current fiscal condition, I want to address several concerns about the tree.



First, the holiday tree was selected in secret (i.e. I wasn’t asked), potentially behind closed doors (or at least doors that close) and someone might have been smoking in the room (hence it could have been smoked-filled). I think the public deserves a much more open process for tree selection. I know the tree is already cut, placed and being decorated, but talk radio in Milwaukee has already made this an issue, thus my hands are tied.



Further, to bind the will of the future governor by pre-selecting ornaments, lights and tinsel is ignoring the will of the voters who spoke loud and clear in the last election - they do not want a lame duck governor and legislature decorating the taxpayer tree. I, along with the newly elected legislature, should make this and all decisions next year regardless of how much sense that directive makes.



While returning the ornaments freely donated and created by Wisconsin school children for our tree might initially seem foolhardy, the future maintenance and storage of these decorations could potentially cost the taxpayers a smidge of a part of a fraction of a percentage of our operating budget. I need the flexibility in the final months of the biennium to see if we can outsource this to the private sector, as I plan to have most state workers on furlough by then.



Finally, there is the matter of the train running around the tree. It must be stopped. It goes nowhere. It does not go there fast enough. Not enough people are riding on it. It is a boondoggle. I ask that you use it to fund roads and to reduce the deficit. Send it to any other community. Just make sure it no longer reaches Madison.



I realize that waiting until I am sworn into office on Jan. 3, 2011 to make these decisions means that we will have a bare space in the rotunda for the holidays and that school children everywhere will be saddened. But these are extraordinary times that demand extraordinary measures…that is to say, my measures.



Thank you for your consideration of this request and for understanding that my sole motivation for sending this letter is to create 250,000 jobs in Wisconsin. And in the spirit of the holidays, April Fo….ah Merry Christmas!



Sincerely,



Gov.-elect Scott Walker


I found this letter on the printer in 309 East. Yes, it is December 1 not April 1, but since all decisions are being moved up anyway...what the heck! Don't take it too seriously anyone, ok? It's the holidays!

25 comments:

  1. I officially love you, Mark Pocan.

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  2. It would be funnier if it didn't ring so true.

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  3. I am SO glad that you represent me in the Assembly, Mark. (BTW - YOU were a member of the Legislature that changed it back to "Christmas Tree". Shall we assume that you were using the old term "holiday tree" in anticipation of a roll-back there, too?)

    Best wishes.

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  4. So good, and so true. Thank you for posting, Mark!

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  5. Beautiful! Almost as beautiful as the big tree in the rotunda! ;)

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  6. This is brilliant, thank you Mark! I am proud to have you as my Assemblyman!

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  7. love it, but I agree is it is so true, the map shown last night on the news about the train brought tears to my eyes. I hope the voters that voted him in are happy!

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  8. So you guys spend money, our money, not yours, like it is going out of style and you choose to muse about what the new Governor has to put up with going forward. (Millions in this budget year and approaching a billion next budget?)Yes, this is preciously funny.
    I hope you did this from your office. It would fit nicely into the waste of space. Thanks Co-Chair.

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  9. Fantastic. Wish I could laugh, if it wasn't so close to the sad truth.

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  10. That.....was......awesome! Hits it right on the head, and I am damn proud you are my Assemblyman.

    You are giving those goons the respect they deserve.

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  11. I helped vote him in and I am happy...and I don't mind this lame duck decorating the tree. If he is busy with that, maybe he won't be finding ways of spending money he doesn't have.

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  12. Sounds like an article in The Onion.

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  13. "I have of late, but wherefore I know not, lost all my mirth...."

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  14. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.

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  15. Enjoyed this, esp. "the matter of the train going around the tree" ...ha!

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  16. Walker is showing his true colors - what a complete TOOL

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  17. I’m surprised the comments haven’t inspired more vitriolic bile. In due time. Until then, thank you for the humor and wit, even if you wrote it from your office. Odd though, how most of the comments were posted during the work day.

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  18. This is wonderful. Thank you so much for representing me.

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  19. Dear Cancervatives,
    Try to get a life or at least a sense of humor.

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